Travails of a lost soul…
The journal of a sad, lonely, dying soul.

Why write now?

I must let someone know how I feel…

Over the almost 60 years of my life, I have been silent.  Except for occasional outbursts of pain and anger, I have kept my innermost thoughts and fears to myself, refusing to get into drawn out discussions about why I do things that way.

I am now at that stage when voicing my fears ang regrets is important — almost critical — to keeping my sanity.  Each day is filled with pain, depression and sorrow and yet no one knows how deeply I hurt.

I hope that by writing about everything that has made me what I am today — sad, lonely, unhappy, alone — I may lift the burden that crushes me more each day.  Few people know the physical and mental pain of depression; I do, because I live it everyday.

I need — before I die — to feel joy and the ecstacy of happiness.  That is the one wish I have left…one day of pure, unadulterated joy.

Is that too much to ask?

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